Closed For Maintenance

Sorry, I am closed today

And maybe for a few

It’s nothing that somebody did

Just what I have to do

Life isn’t always highway miles

The road can wear you down

The tread was starting to wear thin

From traveling all around

It’s the nature of the journey

And this traveler’s defense

To take time for a few repairs

And try to make some sense

Of all the signs that I have seen

And places I have been

The faces and their stories

Before I go again

So, it’s just a little time for me

To see where I have come

And measure where I am at now

By where I have come from

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The Vision

It may have been a vision

It could have been a dream

Awake or lost in slumber

Or somewhere in between

He came to her from far beyond

The veil of time we know

Bearing one last message

Amidst a certain glow

He made a final promise

A gift that he would give

A gift that can’t be opened

As long as she may live

He told her death was painful

When you face it on your own

But when your time to leave has come

You will not be alone

I’ll be there to hold your hand

The way a father should

And guide you to the other side

The way no other could

Then the demons and the burdens

That had turned his day to night

Fell away and showed his naked soul

A pure and loving light

I think about that often

And it always brings me tears

But it fills my weary soul with hope

And eases those old fears

So, I dream of sweet reunions

With the ones who are now gone

A place where pain is never known

Where everyone lives on

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After Lesser Review

Every day in every way

For better or for worse

All you say is so cliché

A blessing and a curse

Lies and empty promises

Reasons with no rhyme

Numbers on a calendar

Hands that tell no time

You can’t replay the future

You can’t outrun your past

You cannot rock for ages

The end is coming fast

The world outside cannot get in

And no one’s getting out

All your dreams and visions

Have faded into doubt

Every empty hour

Spent pacing this damned floor

Led me to my resting place

Camped outside this door

Rain is running off this awning

And pouring down my shirt

Mingling with these tears of age

And puddling in the dirt

Survival Guide

I’m not sure if I’m wiser

But certain I’m older

Alone in a world

That grows steadily colder

Here in this land

Of such glaring extremes

I’m shocked and I’m saddened

By all I have seen

Looking for reasons

A clue or a plan

Answers to questions

No one understands

Feeling the pains

Of those living without

Praying for justice

But having my doubts

I’m a face in the crowd

I’m a fool on the run

With my heart on my sleeve

And my time nearly done

I look to the ones

Whose hearts are still pure

Who give me the love

And the strength to endure

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Shadows

I am hiding in the shadows
That cloud my troubled mind
A prisoner of circumstance
A little hard to find
A thin façade that shelters me
From all the things I fear
That keeps you at distance
If you should get too near
People think they see inside me
When they really have no clue
They only have perspective
Based on a point of view
Words that stain the page in blood
Leave the slightest trace
Of all that scars the hidden heart
Like lines upon a face
Exposed so briefly in the light
You get a glimpse within
Before I find the safety
Of the shadows once again

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Memorial Day

Too many kings
Playing with pawns
Too many nightmares
That never see dawn
Too many children
In flag-covered boxes
Too many fields
Lined with white crosses
Too many teardrops
On too many faces
Too many missing
That no one replaces
Too many tyrants
All guilty of treason
Too many dying
Without any reasons
Too many wars
That can not be won
Taking mothers and fathers
Daughters and sons
Too many leaders
Who lead us to war
Paying the price
With the sons of the poor
Too many memories
Look at the cost
When nothing is gained
And everything’s lost

CN - 5/25/09

Looking Back and Moving Forward

Regrets and retrospective

Reality and dreams

Illusions and the cold hard truth

Are never what they seem

Memories of failures

Haunt the life that I have built

Wondering what might have been

Living with the guilt

All the fragile ghosts of those

With all the tender hearts

Come to call when darkness falls

And that’s the hardest part

A prisoner of my weakness

Enslaved by my own past

Shackled by the hurt I’ve caused

The light is fading fast

But even in the darkest hour

I know this much is true

The hope that keeps me going

Is the light I see in you

To know you still believe in me

That somehow you still care

Lifts me up like nothing else

These feelings that we share

So, I gather all my doubts and fears

And lock them all away

I draw strength from your loving heart

And face another day

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The Journey

On a road that’s going nowhere

On a sea without a sail

A pilgrim travels blindly

Not sure if he will fail

He has stumbled on his journey

And at times, he’s lost his way

But still he’s moving onward

Embracing each new day

He has cried out to the heavens

And almost sold his soul

For the devil haunts a dreamer

As the journey takes its toll

He looks for something he has lost

He never really owned

Searching for a refuge

Getting by and getting stoned

And now he’s starting over

Like so many times before

A smile adorns his tired face

Not knowing what’s in store

There may be no destination

But the journey drives him on

Hoping that the price paid

Doesn’t turn his heart to stone